Not Letting Fear Get the Best of Us: A Jewish Response

In one of the most known and sung Jewish prayers, Adon Olam, the author ends the prayer, “When I sleep as when I wake, God is with me; I have no fear!” On the one hand this line can be comforting as a profession of faith in God’s will and protection. On the other hand, is it true that we have no fear(s)?! From Paris to Jerusalem, to schools and movie theaters right here at home there is much in our world today to be afraid of. Instead I would argue that indeed we always have fear(s) but what matters is how we manage and cope with them.

Throughout the Torah, our tradition models both positive and negative ways to manage our fears. From the beginning of the redemption from slavery in Egypt, it is possible to see fear as an underlying presence in the Torah. Moses’s mother fears for his life and sends him away. The midwives stand up against the Pharaoh’s orders and the text says they we righteous and had, “fear of God.” Moses fears the wrath of Pharaoh after killing the Egyptian and flees to the wilderness. Then when God calls him at the burning bush, Moses is fearful of taking on God’s prophetic mission. Even when the Jewish people march to freedom in the book of Exodus, God is fearful that the newly freed people will experience war, be afraid and want to turn back. God therefore sends the people on the longer journey through the Sinai instead of the coastal road. It is almost hard to imagine having just witnessed God’s power of the ten plagues that our people would be standing at the sea yelling at Moses that his plan all along was to kill them. Or immediately after crossing through the sea and seeing Pharaoh’s army destroyed, that our people would be fearful of dying of thirst in the wilderness. I think it is very easy to be overly critical of our ancestors in these moments and if we are truly honest with ourselves then we can admit that we all have fears. How would we have reacted with Pharaoh’s chariots bearing down on us? And maybe more importantly how do we cope with our own fears?

Whether it is fear of failure, fear of growing old, fear of being alone, fear of losing a job, or fear of death; if we are honest then we can recognize that we all have our own fears. If we look more closely at the way the Jewish people and God deal with fear, two reactions seem to emerge. The first reaction to fear is the most automatic and instinctual – namely fight, flight or freeze. As humans our lower brains are hardwired to respond to danger in this way. When a lion enters the cave, we can either, run like the wind, attempt to kill it, or play dead and pray it goes away. This reactionary response serves us very well in life/death predicaments but when faced with more complex and enduring challenges, ends up more detrimental than helpful to us because it does not let us process and use our best faculties. In her work as a trauma counselor and researcher at the University of Chicago, Dr. Mary Jo Barrett suggests that when we utilize our mid and upper brains (emotions, logic, planning, values, etc.) we can manage our fears more successfully and develop healthier coping schema and responses to them.

The first step in engaging our higher faculties is to breathe, pause, and ponder. We then truly begin to confront our fears by first identifying them. While obvious, this initial step takes humility and honesty to acknowledge how our deep fears seep into our lives affecting our relationships and our health - physically, mentally and spiritually. This process of self-awareness raises our fear response out of our lower brain and engages our mid brain. I often find that the Amidah (the Silent Prayer) often allows me to refocus, to breathe. Particularly the weekday Amidah sections, which acknowledge my fragility and remind me that God seeks my growth not perfection. Also helpful are the Psalms in which the psalmist speaks of brokenness, longing and a desire for God’s healing presence. My favorite is Psalm 130, said during Tachanun (A twice daily section of supplication and reflection) which begins, “Out of the depths I call to You…” For others it might be Psalm 23, “Yea, though I walk though the shadow of death, You are with me. Your staff and Your rod they comfort me.” In each of these Psalms, God is portrayed as a comforter who journeys with us through the ups and downs of our lives.

It is only after we have identified and named our fears that we then can use all of our resources and logic to find ways to cope and manage our fears. In particular, Judaism reminds us that we are in this together. In fact, our individual fears are most likely shared by others, and that through community we can not only share them but also learn from others how they deal with them.

Finally, when we reach a level of understanding ourselves, we can better recognize when fear is driving our life decisions and getting the best of us. Our tradition teaches that the motivations of love, compassion, kindness, and faith can and do lead us to better selves and better places. And for that reminder I am eternally grateful to the poet of Adon Olam.

I'll Leave the Light On For You

Of all the candles in the Hanukkiah, the one that usually gets the least respect is the shamash. The original meaning of the word, shamash, is attendant, servant, janitor, caretaker or orderly. The shamash is the candle that kindles all of the other Hanukkah candles but is not counted toward the eight days of Hanukkah.  Yet, without the shamash none of the other candles could be lit, since each of these other candles, according to Jewish law, cannot be used for any purpose other than providing their Hanukkah light. So what can we learn from the “servant” candle? - That no matter a person’s job, they should be treated with respect and dignity, since without their hard work most of the things we take for granted could not be fulfilled.  Indeed the Rabbis realizing this lesson required that the lowly shamash, be given a place of honor either higher than the other candles, or set to the side from the other candles.

Yet, all too often the people in these roles become “invisible people.”  People that while they are serving, helping, cleaning, working behind the scenes or literally right in front of us are simply looked past, and ignored.  From cashiers, sandwich makers, toll collectors, nurses, maintenance people, hotel staff, etc. It is amazing to see the smile on a persons face when they are simply thanked or wished a great day. For someone to acknowledge that the work they do is valued and appreciated but even more that they are human beings worthy of respect, kindness, and dignity.

          On Hanukkah, we all can remember the efforts of the many different people, big and small, throughout the year, whose hard work and efforts make our world and our lives better. Hanukkah Sameach! May the Festival of Lights fill your home with warmth, cheer, and love and may we all be privileged to share it with those around us.

A Simple Sound To Bring Down Walls

      From the walls they could see the men circling around, not with swords drawn or spears raised but instead with ram’s horns, shofarot, whose piercing sound shattered the hot mid-day stillness. Seven times they circled, the walls shook with greater ferocity, and the haughty defiance of the defenders faltered with each resounding blast.  Finally with one final unified blast the shofar’s sound like thunder from heaven fulfilled its God given mission to break down the walls, and indeed they submitted and came tumbling down. – my creative adaptation of Joshua 1:2

Ah, the hustle and bustle of living in our fast paced world.  In a New York minute (or Bethlehem minute as the case may be) the connectivity of cell phones, text messages, I.M., twitter, and email only add more to the already full plates for so many of us.  We are over programmed and indeed many would suggest our children are over programmed as well.  We can get so bogged down in the speed of life that we can forget to live.  And yet just as we are about to be consumed by the blur of our schedules, there is a great miracle that we are blessed with each year which I believe helps us remember what life is all about.  The clarion call for deeper meaning which our soul’s seek.  This is the miracle of the shofar blast which jolts us out of our daily routines and prepares us for the Yamim Noraim, the Days of Awe.

Beginning with the 1^st of Elul, Jews throughout the world listen to the blasts of the shofar each day, signaling the coming of Rosh Hashanah and a new year.  This ancient alarm clock with its three varied notes somehow is capable of making us stop and listen.  All of a sudden we want to be quiet enough to hear it.  It captivates us without the use of words, either written or spoken, spontaneous or established.  The mitzvah is only to hear it.  It is precisely the antidote to over intellectualization, over complication, and over programming.  The shofar’s beauty lies in the way it can touch our most genuine feelings in the simplest, most human of ways.  The Rabbi’s looked at the shofar as the ultimate prayer without words, which had the capacity of stirring God’s deepest emotions from judgment to compassion, from anger to love.

The prospect of change, teshuvah, doesn’t require a doctorate in Jewish spiritual renewal or a fluency in Hebrew liturgy.  What it does require however, is the ability to look deep inside ourselves in an honest and genuine way.  The shofar holds up that big red stop sign, which allows us to free ourselves from all of the distractions which inundate us, and allows us to connect to our visceral spiritual selves. We stand quietly, listening, as the shofar blasts carry us to a different place within ourselves. God commanded Joshua to use the shofar’s power to topple the strong walls of Jericho, how much more so can it have the power to penetrate the walls of our own hearts, knocking down apathy, hubris, and misplaced values.  

Rabbi Meir taught that we should blow the shofar one hundred times, corresponding to the one hundred blessings which are recited each day.  As we stop to listen to the shofar blast, may its ancient call hold blessing for us and the entire Jewish people for a new year filled with life, joy and sweetness.  

L’shana Tovah Tikateivu v’Tichateimu! – May you be inscribed and sealed for a good new year!

If I Forget You, O Jerusalem...

       The month of Av approaches with the saddest day in the Jewish calendar (aside from Yom HaShoah - Holocaust Remembrance Day), Tisha B’Av (9th of Av) looming. This year as rockets continue to rain down on Jerusalem, Tel Aviv, Haifa, Beersheva, Ashkelon, Ashdod, etc., more than ever the words, “If I forget you, O Jerusalem may my right hand wither, let my tongue stick to my palate if I cease to think of you…” (Psalm 137:5) seems not only the dirge of the ancient Psalmist but an immediate command upon all our hearts. 

On Tisha B’Av our tradition teaches that we mourn not only for the destruction of our Temples, our loss of independence, and our long troubled years of exile, persecution, and the diaspora which followed - but that we mourn the baseless hatred - sinat hinam which led to these events. The history of the destruction of the Second Temple reveals that the zealots believed any action was justified, even if it meant the murder and death of their fellow Jews. So warped were their values that they even burned the food stores inside of Jerusalem to prevent innocent civilians from fleeing the siege. How could it be that our people heirs to the gift of Torah, where God commands us to choose life, sacrifice our children for religious nihilism?   Tisha B’Av comes as a stark reminder that hatred and fanaticism are not only destructive to those that hate but, also to those who tolerate and ignore it. Therefore, we fast, mourn, and seek to ingrain in our very DNA this lesson from our past.

Yet, the question we confront in our world today is - What will it take for the Palestinians, Syrians, Iraqis, Pakistanis, Afghanis, etc. to stop the hate and extremism? When will their peoples rise up and demand - Life & Peace!? There can be no doubt that Hamas's hatred of Israel and hatred of Jews outweigh any thought for the sanctity of innocent life, even their own children. We are witness to the thousand plus rockets launched at Israel by Hamas from civilian areas. Hamas sees no moral problem using hospitals, schools, and mosques, to store and launch missiles indiscriminately at Israeli civilians with the only goal of bringing terror, and killing as many as possible. In contrast, Israel has gone above and beyond to try to spare civilian casualties on both sides. Israel twice has agreed to a cease-fire for the sake of innocent lives, continuously warning civilians by phone and by “roof knocking” to get away from Hamas before bombing a terrorist target. Also thank God for Israeli ingenuity whose passion to save lives fostered the building of the Iron Dome which has shot down countless rockets, early warning sirens, and for the home front command which built a smartphone app to warn citizens when to seek refuge in reinforced bomb shelters. As Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu neatly summed it up,"the difference between us is that we're using missile defense to protect our civilians and they're using their civilians to protect their missiles." 

This Tisha B’Av we will once again fast, read Eicha (Book of Lamentations), and sing kinot (dirges) but, I for one will also be mourning that the world has not yet learned what we did so many years ago - that baseless hatred only leads to death and destruction. “Peace will come when the Arabs love their children more than they hate us.”  This famous sentence spoken by Golda Meir to the Washington Press Club in 1957, continues to ring hauntingly true and sadly unfulfilled. May we live to see the day when love, peace, and life triumph over hatred, war, and death. And let us all say, Amen.

The Last Word

       If I were to ask the question what the first word of the Torah is, most people would be able to answer - “In the Beginning” (B’reishit). Yet, I would wager most people would not know what the last word of the Torah is. Again tellingly, I think most Americans could start the Declaration of Independence, the Preamble of the Constitution, or the Gettysburg address but, ending them is a whole other story. I believe this phenomena exists because it is inherently more memorable and easier to begin things; while it is much harder to finish them, and see them through to the end. In our personal lives we can probably count home projects or ideas that we started but never finished. Sometimes we simply lose interest and focus, and other times life just gets in the way. 
 
      But, when we do finish a project, complete an assignment, or graduate there is a real sense of accomplishment. Often it becomes sweeter looking back over the journey and taking stock of all of the twists and turns we never could have imagined when we first began. So it is as well with the Torah. “In the Beginning” (B’reishit), starts with God creating the world but, while God finished and rested on the seventh day - Shabbat - the real journey was truly only beginning. Similarly, the last word of the Torah, “Israel” (Yisrael) or more accurately All Israel (Kol-Yisrael) is not really the conclusion of the story but, also a new beginning albeit very different. While God initiates the original Creation, in contrast the end of the Torah highlights the partnership between God and the whole people of Israel. The journey of creation has now been placed not only in God’s hands, or into any one person’s hand (like Moses) but, instead into the Jewish people’s hands as a whole. In truth, it is all Israel who are about to cross-over into the Promised Land, and create the homeland which will bear their name. 

      Similarly our life journeys have many ups, downs, twists and turns from our own “In the Beginning” to “All Israel”. For nine wonderful years I have been a part of Temple Beth David, and the larger Palm Beach Jewish community. Never could I have imagined the amazing people I would get to meet, work with, and become dear friends with. I have been truly blessed to have such dedicated rabbis, cantors, educators and lay leaders who every day strive to make Jewish life in the Palm Beaches deeply meaningful, vibrant, and sacred. Thank you for the opportunity to teach Torah, bring my voice and vision, and add my hands to the holy work of this community. As Rabbi Simlai taught, “the Torah begins with acts of lovingkindness and ends with acts of lovingkindness,”(Sotah 14a) and so too has my journey here in the Palm Beaches. Thank you for nine years of kindness, understanding, and most of all - love. 

Remembering the Shoah One Name At A Time

Everyday new studies are being initiated and conducted to determine the effects of the use of technology on our memories. Think about it, at one point in the not too distant past, people had to memorize historical dates, the Preamble of the Constitution, how to spell words correctly, and yes, other people’s phone numbers (as well as their own). Today such information is literally only a click or voice command away. Even the passwords we use to “protect” our information can be stored and saved in case we forget them.  I am not suggesting that we can or should turn back the clock or that we as a society would even want to. We are indeed privileged to live at this exciting time, and have a world of information accessible earlier generations would be envious of.

Yet, there is still an important place for first hand use of human memory. Making memories entails taking the information around us and internalizing it in a way that not only creates neuro-pathways in our brain but literally becomes part of who we are. This is more than doing a Google search or posting on Facebook. In fact research₁ shows that posts, tweets, and texts engage only short term memory, they are quick, in the moment, snapshots that don’t last long because they are followed by more posts, tweets, and texts. Arguably, this is indeed the purpose of this type of media communication but, as far as the faculty of memory is concerned this does not translate to creating long-term memories that change, enhance, and enrich us.

As Jews living after the horror of the Shoah (The Holocaust) we have often been taught, “Never Forget!” But, how do we do that? Especially in our world today?! Unlike so many of the other holidays and commemorations in the Jewish life-cycle and calendar, Yom HaShoah (Holocaust Remembrance Day) does not have a universally accepted ritual, sacred text, or even communal service of some type (let alone special foods or lack thereof). I believe that it is through these rituals that we as Jews, have been not only able to maintain our traditions but as important been able to create memories that literally transform and touch our souls. They bring meaning to our lives by connecting us through the generations, informing our relationships, our values, and our moral perspective.  Which brings us back to the challenge of Yom HaShoah. With very few survivors left, how can we ensure that their stories and those of the millions of Jews who perished will not be forgotten?

One way my synagogue has found to create powerful memories is by holding a Yom HaShoah vigil in which we read the names of those who perished in the Shoah. People sign-up to read names and to come and listen throughout the day beginning after morning services and continuing for twelve hours stopping only for mincha/ma’ariv where we recite the Mourner’s Kaddish in remembrance. From families that come to read together, to our teens and older members - we read their names - we hear their names, and in doing so I feel we not only keep their memory alive but make our own powerful memories. The sacred duty to never forget becomes not only a surreal number to remember but, real mothers, fathers, and children. The Nazis counted numbers but we remember names.

We have always believed that names carry memory. As Jews we remember loved ones by naming our children after them. We still use the ancient names from our Torah - Adam, Seth, Jacob, Rachel, Sarah…It is no coincidence then that our people’s Hebrew name - Yisrael, links God’s name with ours. By remembering the names of our brothers and sisters who perished in the Shoah we link their names and lives with our own. And in that way may all of their names be for a blessing - one we never need a password to remember.

1 How Technology Is Warping Your Memory The Huffington Post  |  By Carolyn Gregoire

Save Me A Seat At The Seder Table: Why The Wicked Child Is Invited

Of all the major Jewish holidays, Pesach is focused in our homes, and more specifically around our tables. From the initial cleaning of our homes, the search for hametz, and the making of the matzah balls, the spiritual center of Pesach is sitting around the seder table and telling the story of how God saved our people, taking us from slavery to freedom. In telling the story of our exodus, our rabbis in the haggadah, use the metaphor of four children, each with different levels of understanding and each asking different questions. They wanted each of us to literally look around the seder table and tell the story so that each person there would be moved, challenged, and inspired by the story.

Yet, of all the four children represented in the story - the Wise, the Wicked, the Simple and the One Who Doesn’t Know How to Ask, why each year would the host of the seder invite the Wicked Child? As a reminder, the wicked child asks, “What mean you by this service?! By the word “you,” it is clear he does not include himself in the community.” Whoa! Talk about attitude! The question of the Wicked Child can be understood not only as his eyes rolling to the back of his head but also a total disconnect from the family, our people and the tradition. 

It is completely understandable that the first year when the wicked child initially asks their question the parent responds. In that case, the seder leader’s response seems relevant if not a necessary stern rebuke of the wicked child even going as far as to say, “had he been there (in Egypt), he would not have been redeemed!” But what is not obvious is why year after year the Wicked Child is invited back! Is it just because he had to move back in with his parents? Maybe he loves his mother’s chicken soup, or maybe it’s just some type of masochistic fetish? After all why would you want someone at the seder table who does not feel a part of the holiday or even the people, and actively taunts others about it?!

Maybe the answer lies with the very story of Pesach itself. Our people start out hungry, enslaved, and abused. We are strangers in Egypt physically but we are also estranged from our innate sense of dignity, self-worth and connectedness to our land and our right to determine our future. In the end God nourishes us, gives us hope, and restores our freedom. The journey we travel however is not a straight one. In fact when Moses first goes to Pharaoh seeking our freedom, Pharaoh not only rejects Moses but also increases the burden on our people. The people’s response to this is to blame Moses and mock him. Indeed, over and over throughout our journey to freedom, the people continually accuse Moses of trying to kill them and wish they could return to Egypt.

Likewise, the Wicked Child is hungry, estranged and adrift. Had he not been invited to the seder, he would not have been able to engage in the conversation, and would not have maybe even recognized what he was missing. Surrounded by family, by community, by food that not only nourishes the body but also speaks to the values of love, hope, and freedom, the Wicked Child may by the end of the seder have been moved. The opportunity exists only because the Wicked Child has been welcomed and invited. Remember, the Wicked Child shows up when invited every year! The tradition believes that even though the Wicked Child does not feel a part of Jewish life and tradition now, the door is always open and more specifically a place around the table has been set and is waiting for him. May our tables but more importantly, our hearts, be big enough, welcoming enough, and hopeful enough to invite all who are hungry to come and join us at the seder table.

Chag Kasher v’ Sameach!

Purim, the B.D.S. Movement & The Dangers of Ignoring History

     While the Boycott, Divestment & Sanctions (B.D.S.) movement against Israel has existed for years, recently it has become much more serious with the Presbyterian Church, European Union, and worldwide academic institutions, even right here in the U.S., jumping on the B.D.S. bandwagon. Even the Super Bowl garnered B.D.S. pressure. The Israeli company SodaStream’s spokeswoman Scarlett Johansen was dropped by the Oxfam aid organization for her participation in the SodaStream commercial. While it might seem trivial to some people who tout Israel’s strong economy and military prowess, it is indeed very serious and should not be taken lightly. At the core of the B.D.S. movement is an attack on Israel’s legitimacy as a full-fledged nation among other nations, casting Israel as a pariah state, and ultimately providing cover for deep-seated anti-Semitism.

     While proponents of the B.D.S. movement claim their goal is to pressure Israel to make peace with the Palestinians and to call attention to the hardships that Palestinians face, what is obvious in its rhetoric is that they feel Israelis are evil oppressors whose treatment of the Palestinians can be equated with the worst human rights violations in the world, and that Israel and Jews around the world who support her are willing accomplices and morally bankrupt. These words are not hyperbolic but truly are at the heart of the B.D.S. campaign. Any company, university, or government that does business with Israel falls into this category.

     We should not be fooled into believing that this movement is only about the “government policies” of Israel, because when Israel is cast as the “other”, every Jew bears that label as well. This is a classic strategy from the anti-Semite playbook. In the story of Purim, Haman first targeted Mordechai, and then sought to move against the whole Jewish people. His strategy was to convince King Achashverosh that the Jews were a “different” people. He claimed the Jews would not follow the king’s laws, and that they were not citizens of the Persian Empire but instead were outsiders, pariahs, even seditious traitors. It was only when Haman had persuaded King Achashverosh of this that he asked for a royal decree enabling anti-Semites throughout the kingdom to kill the Jews.

     
     Sadly the history of anti-Semitism has a way of repeating itself in every age under different guises. Like Haman, the supporters of B.D.S. seek to pigeonhole Israel as the chief violator of the basic laws of the world. Forget that many other nations do not even afford freedom of speech, access to courts, academic freedom, and even the most basic human rights, Israel is the only target of B.D.S. It would be interesting to question those passionate about B.D.S. about why they aren’t outraged by child soldiers in Africa, human rights in China, or the basic civil and political rights of women in most of the Arab world to name just a few. Therefore, it is crystal clear that the goal of B.D.S. is not to pressure Israel towards peace with the Palestinians but instead to make it okay to desensitize, ostracize, and eventually demonize Israel and the Jewish people throughout the world, both on the larger world stage, and right in the midst of our local communities.

     As we approach the holiday of Purim we are reminded by reading the Megillah not to forget how close we came to tragedy. We celebrate the heroism of Esther who found the courage to speak out against the lies of Haman, and turn the tide against those who would have murdered us. And like Esther, hiding or hoping someone else will come and save us is not the answer. Today, we must again find that courage to speak out, and not let the dark lessons of our past go unheeded.   

Caretakers of God's Masterpieces

When President Theodore Roosevelt championed the designation of National Parks, he said, ”We have fallen heirs to the most glorious heritage a people ever received, and each one must do his part if we wish to show that the nation is worthy of its good fortune.” An avid outdoorsman, Roosevelt was often more at home in the wilderness than in the political back alleys of Washington yet, what is evident in his words is that the natural beauty in our world requires each of us to do our part in taking care of it. It is hard to imagine today our countrywithout the National Parks but, before Roosevelt lobbied to create them, rampant industrialization was literally raping the land of its resources without regard to conservation or the complete destruction of the land.As Dr. Seuss would later write, “Business is business, and business must grow, regardless of crummies in tummies, you know.…” (The Lorax)

In Jewish thought and law since the Earth was created by God, the entire Earth itself is owned by God. As tenants on God’s earth we must not wantonly destroy it (baal tashchit) and are in fact positively commanded to be caretakers of it. Midrash Kohelet Rabbah 7:28 teaches, “When God created the first man He took him and showed him all the trees of the Garden of Eden and said to him 'See My works, how beautiful and praiseworthy they are. And everything that I created, I created it for you. Be careful not to spoil or destroy My world — for if you do, there will be nobody after you to repair it.” The midrash’s words of wisdom ring as true today as ever. As a world, we are inching closer to environmental catastrophe caused by our progress, growth and development. We are consuming our planet faster than our planet can rejuvenate and replenish itself. With melting ice caps, an island of garbage in the Pacific, and the continuing rise of animal extinctions we are destroying God’s masterpieces at an ever increasing rate.

But we can still change this course. The state of Israel is a great example of where there is a will there is a way. Combining ingenuity and resolve Israel is the only country that has more trees today than at the beginning of the twentieth century. Through the efforts of the Jewish National Fund(JNF), and its tree planting initiative millions of trees have been planted. Today the JNF is working to create sustainable water solutions for the Negev and manage water more efficiently around the country. Each time I visit Israel, I am continually amazed at how technology is being used and developed to conserve and preserve the land. Israel exports this technology around the world and has been instrumental in teaching green ways to farm in Africa and Asia.Yet, we are slower here in America to adopt eco-friendly policies and practices that other countries around the world have already adopted. We mistakenly believe that our freedom and rights come before anything else. We are sadly resistant to adopting new restrictions that will change or impinge on our “American” way of life.

On Tu B’Shevat, the Jewish new year of trees, we have the opportunity once again to raise environmental awareness in our communities. We should resolve to redouble our efforts to living more in tune with our environment. From coffee cups to paper towels we live in one of the worlds most disposable societies. We can start to change this in small ways by bringing our own coffee cups to work & synagogue, using reusable bags when grocery shopping, taking shorter showers, carpooling, and redoubling our efforts to recycle. Each behavior we change does make a difference. As rugged an individualist as President Roosevelt was, it was clear that he understood the need to balance between using our nations resources and preserving God’s masterpieces. As he wrote,“Of all the questions which can come before this nation, short of the actual preservation of its existence in a great war, there is none which compares in importance with the great central task of leaving this land even a better land for our descendants than it is for us.” To this we should all say, Amen!

Alive in the Marketplace of Life - Judaism Wants YOU!

Leaders of the American Jewish community have been pouring over the latest demographic and cultural data from a survey done by the Pew Research Institute. Rightly so, there is much to be alarmed at from the findings. And yet, I believe the time is ripe for a new Jewish renaissance. For far too long, Judaism has kept a low profile in the marketplace of religion in America. We have a tradition of not actively proselytizing and even turning potential seekers away. Whether this was due to the historical effects of anti-Semitism, or a circling of the wagons, we have often only focused our attention in the Jewish community on those that were by birth traditionally considered Jewish. In the modern world we live in though, this alone is not enough. After all America is about competition in the marketplace of ideas. It is about the best rising to the top and succeeding. The fastest growing religious group in America is “None of the Above.” Interestingly however, the Pew study found that 94% of those polled said they were, “proud to be Jewish.”

Like the 94% I am proud to be called a Jew. I am proud of what Jewish wisdom and ethics has to say about our world and our lives. I am proud of the multiplicity of opinions, and ideas that our Jewish tradition uniquely applauds and cherishes. I am proud to be part of the creative enterprise which is the growth and prosperity of the State of Israel. I am proud to teach and learn, sing and dance, celebrate and comfort, remember and create anew with my fellow Jews. I am even proud to make choices that run counter-cultural to what everybody else is doing (some of the time). I am proud to believe that there is something greater than myself, and that I am indebted to, grateful for, commanded by, and in partnership with God. Yet, are we as a community too proud to encourage and actively seek out and welcome spiritual searchers who have no particular faith affiliation? We should be saying, “Come one, come all! Learn what Judaism and Jewish living has to offer!”

Ask any rabbi who has guided new Jews-by-Choice into the Jewish people how they feel when these Jews become vibrant and active in our community. It is a deeply sacred experience to see people so moved by Jewish life and practice taking the plunge into the mikveh, making their declaration of faith, and choosing their new Hebrew names. The power of the moment reminds us that our tradition is indeed compelling, meaningful, and holy. People choose and want to be a part of it. Our tradition celebrates Jews-by-Choice by giving them, as part of their Hebrew name, the spiritual parents of Abraham and Sarah, and reminds us that it is from Ruth the Moabite that King David descends.

I believe the future vibrancy of the Jewish community rests in part on reaching out to all spiritual seekers, both those traditionally defined as Jewish, and to the countless people who are just searching for something meaningful. I believe there are many people just waiting to be invited into our tradition, to be welcomed into our tent. We must not turn people away, but instead invite them to join in the experience, the wealth, and the benefits of Jewish life. In America as in the modern world at large, we cannot be a closed community, we need to recognize that we are all Jews-by-Choice on our journey of faith and life. So a big welcome to all! Judaism wants YOU!

Latkes and Cranberry Sauce: Perfect Together!

If I were the Hallmark cards company, I would take advantage of a super-limited once in a 77,000 year opportunity to print Thanksgivukkah cards. Not only could they be collectors items but who knows if paper cards will even exist then! But the confluence of Thanksgiving and Hanukkah have a lot more in common than meets the eye, particularly in their origin stories. Hanukkah as a holiday commemorates the struggle for Jewish religious and political freedom. Buckling under the tyranny of both the Greeks and their hellenistic Jewish sympathizers, Jews were forbidden to practice Judaism. They were humiliated, forced to partake of pagan rituals, and killed. Finally, a group of freedom fighters, led by Mattathias and his five sons, took up arms and after a long gorilla war, won our independence. The holiday of Hanukkah was instituted by the victors to commemorate the military victory and the purification and rededication (the Hebrew word Hanukkah means to Dedicate) of the Temple. 

For the Puritans, aka the “Pilgrims”, they first came to these shores to seek refuge and escape the religious persecution and intolerance they faced in England. Willing to risk their lives and that of their families, they set sail to a relatively unknown land with few of the basic skills they would need to survive here. Yet, their hope was to found a “new Jerusalem”, and create a community and society based on their own religious convictions. One of their religious beliefs was a literal reading and strict adherence to the Bible. The Puritans made a point of celebrating each of the Torah’s holidays. They strictly observed the Sabbath, Pentecost (meaning revelation of the 5 books - our holiday of Shavuot), Thanksgiving (our harvest thanksgiving holiday of Sukkot), and Easter (pascal lamb & last supper). While it is most certainly true that without the help and guidance of Native Americans the Pilgrims would have perished in their new land, it is not out of the realm of possibility that they would have also celebrated a harvest Thanksgiving holiday a la Sukkot with their Native American neighbors.

Both ironically and sadly, these same Pilgrims, would later persecute Jews seeking the same religious freedom in America. In fact when, the first Jews came to America, escaping from the long arm of the Catholic Church’s Spanish (and later Portuguese) Inquisition, they faced harsh religious intolerance and outright anti-Semitism at the hands of the Pilgrims. The Jewish community of Massachusetts Bay Colony were summarily thrown out of the territory and had to seek refuge from Roger Williams in Rhodes Island (i.e.,Touro Synagogue). 

Another aspect that both Hanukkah and Thanksgiving share is how the holidays added traditions different from their original stories and meanings. If the original Hanukkah holiday was focused on the Maccabean victory and the Temple; the holiday today, thanks to our ancient Rabbis, focuses on God’s miracle of the oil, and the lighting of the hanukkiah. In effect our tradition morphed Hanukkah from essentially a one day victory feast, to an eight day celebration focused on lighting one’s home, and a public display of Jewish identity (The Hanukkiah was traditionally placed in the window and lit so passersby could see - b’farhesiah). In modern times, Hanukkah changed yet again with presents, decorations, Jewish pride and Adam Sandler’s Hanukkah Song now a part of the Festival of Lights. The Thanksgiving of today also evolved over time. When President Abraham Lincoln officially instituted Thanksgiving, I am sure he could not imagine the Macy’s parade, NFL football, or sadly the mad rush of consumerism which has overtaken Thanksgiving’s original intention of giving thanks to God for home and hearth. 

With Hanukkah and Thanksgiving falling together this year, I believe we have a unique opportunity as Jewish Americans to educate ourselves and others about the true meaning of these holidays. From their origins of religious tolerance, thankfulness to God for all of the blessings we enjoy, and the co-operation and hope for our communities and society, we certainly have a lot to celebrate. So let’s enjoy our latkes with cranberry sauce, open our pantries to those in need, and bring the light of God into the world with kindness and joy! 

Happy Thanksgivukkah!

You Are Not Alone: An Answer to Sh’ma Koleinu

One of the most moving prayers during the past month of holidays is the prayer Sh’ma Koleinu – which literally means – “Hear Our Voice.” This prayer is a deep heartfelt plea to God not to abandon us, not to hide from us, but instead to hear our prayers and renew us. Traditionally the Cantor chants each verse and the congregation repeats it. I have often wondered why we would even need such a prayer? After all by this point in the service we have already been praying to God for quite some time! Yet, there is something so emotional about the poet’s words, a feeling of vulnerability and weakness, a fear of being alone even in a group, a feeling that if God can’t hear us in our pain then who will?

For some types of hurt, sharing our pain with others is part of our tradition, and often it is out in the open, and can be easily recognized. When we suffer a loss of a loved one, the mourner literally shows their grief by tearing clothing/ribbon as an outward sign of their broken heart. The community responds to the mourner by comforting the mourner, bringing food, attending minyanim, and surrounding them with love and support.

But, there is another type of hurt that is all too often hidden and not in our communal consciousness enough – the pain of Domestic Abuse.  October is National Domestic Violence Awareness month, and for too many in our community, the physical, verbal, and psychological abuse they suffer is a secret. It is hidden by makeup, an outward appearance of normalcy, and shame. It is a constant fear that no one will believe them, a fear of what will happen if they come forward, and a fear of what their abuser might do to them if they found out.

The stereotypes of “that doesn’t happen in the Jewish community”, or “nice Jewish boys/girls don’t do that”, or “this is a only a women’s issue”, or “it only happens in poor households” not only are completely wrong, but actually often act as social barriers for the victims who are contemplating how to get help. Too many instead suffer silently, afraid, intimidated and alone.

What these hidden members of our congregations and our community need is a voice, someone to speak out and then to answer their private Sh’ma Koleinu. That’s where the Rosenberg Domestic Abuse program* and KOLOT come in. The Rosenberg Domestic Abuse program is a part of Alpert Jewish Family & Children's Services. It is a safe place for anyone who is suffering from abuse to get help and support. You are not alone! We are here for you and no one has the right to diminish and abuse you, especially those who are closest to you. Whether it is your wife, husband, boyfriend or girlfriend, it is not your fault and there is never an excuse for abuse. KOLOT is the communal voice to raise awareness. It is made up of clergy, community leaders, but mostly caring men and women who want to help in a tangible way. Our community teen trainers teach their peers about healthy and unhealthy relationships and the signs of abuse. Finally, the annual “No Excuse For Abuse” Luncheon brings together hundreds dedicated to getting out the message that abuse happens in our Jewish community and we need to support the victims and caregivers. 

The pain of abuse alone is terrible, the suffering in silence only makes it worse. Let us be a sukkat shalom – a refuge of wholeness to those who are still suffering under abuse, and let us be there to hear their prayers of Sh’ma Koleinu and answer them with our own voices of courage, comfort, and love.

*Rosenberg Domestic Abuse hotline number: 561 684-1991

When Rosh HaShanah Comes Early & Other Calendar Quirks

Okay, here’s a question for all you trivia buffs out there. When was the last time Rosh Hashanah began as early as September 5th? 

Give up? Try 1899! That was the year that Queens and Staten Island became part of New York City, the Great Blizzard of 1899 pounded South Florida with snow, and fighting in Afghanistan continued to rage (then it was the British but sadly some things never change). This was also the year when the paperclip and Bayer aspirin were patented, and voting machines were okay’d for federal elections.(Hmm, chads, hanging or not) Yep, the last time Rosh Hashanah fell on September 5th was the year the Bronx Zoo opened in New York, and when all is said and done, it will be another 76 years (2089) until this Rosh Hashanah comes this early again. 

So as you can imagine rabbis everywhere are scrambling to finish sermons and Jews everywhere are asking, “has the Jewish calendar gone crazy!?” Well, not exactly. In reality the Jewish calendar works on a 19 year cycle adding a 13th month (Adar 2) in years 3, 6, 8, 11, 14, 17 and 19. This is year 17 of that cycle and represents the longest possible year in the Jewish calendar of 385 days. The Jewish calendar which is based primarily on the lunar cycle, makes these adjustments in order to keep the holidays in sync with with solar seasons. This keeps Passover in the spring and Sukkot in the fall. While it is not uncommon for the calendar to add a month during these leap years or for the holidays to be “early” or “late”, what is different this year is the extreme “earliness” in relation to the secular calendar. The next time Rosh Hashanah will fall on September 5th will as mentioned above be in 2089 or in the Jewish counting 5850 which is why this year is so special. 

But wait that’s not all. This year the first night of Hanukkah and Thanksgiving are on the same day! According to Steve Morse, this is the first time that’s happened since President Lincoln originally established Thanksgiving in 1863 and it is also the last time it'll happen until the year 79,811. I'll say that again: after this year, Hanukkah and Thanksgiving Day won’t overlap for another 77,798 years! The reason is because the Jewish calendar is very slowly getting out of sync with the solar calendar, at a rate of 4 days per 1000 years (not bad for a many centuries old calendar!) This means that while presently Hanukkah can be as early as 11/28, over the years the calendar will drift forward, such that the earliest Hanukkah can be is 11/29. It is my belief that at some distant future time the rabbis will again need to come together and recalibrate the calendar for another 5 thousand years. Until then we can all enjoy the special nature of this extraordinary new year. 

May the new year of 5774 be filled  with the blessings of good health, happiness, and prosperity for you and your family! 

Tisha B'Av & The Danger of Hatred

Why can’t we learn! In the year 70 CE the Romans destroyed the Temple, throwing down the stones and burning the rest. What remained was the retaining platform of which the Western Wall is a part. Even as smoke still rose from the destroyed Temple, our Sages realized that the destruction was not merely the power of Rome but, at its core the baseless hatred among our own Jewish people that led had led to this tragedy and God’s wrath. The Talmud retells the story of two Jews (Kamsa and Bar-Kamsa)who so despised each other that one of them provokes the Romans and convinces them that the Jews are plotting a revolt, and need to be subdued. Hatred among Jews, the Rabbis teach is the reason the Temple was destroyed. 

     Fast forward to the assassination of Yitzhak Rabin, the Prime Minister of Israel. Who was so vilified in right wing extreme circles by “rabbis” (I use that term lightly) who called for anything to stop peace talks. Sadly those hateful words became the marching orders for Yigal Amir to murder Rabin at a peace rally in Tel Aviv. Could we learn from this tragedy again the danger of hate? Could we ratchet down the rhetoric of demonization in favor of dialogue and mutual respect for a pluralism of opinions and practices? Could we take from this that violence and coercion do not strengthen us but instead weaken us? After all we already have enough enemies from without who dream of how to destroy us. Maybe, just maybe we could learn and change.

 
     Now fast forward to May 10th of this year. Women gather to pray at the Western Wall, the remnant of our holiest site, the place which reminds us of both God’s glory and our history - joyful and sad. As the women gathered to pray on Rosh Hodesh (welcoming the new month)on the women’s side, with talitot and tefillin, reading Torah, not forcing others to pray as they do, but wishing to express their own religious connection to God and our tradition, they are spat on, bombarded by water bottles, coffee cups, rocks, and a chair while hundreds of men shout curses at them. Israeli riot police have to hold back hundreds of screaming men who are trying to break through to harass them. Encouraged by their Ultra-Orthodox haredi rabbis, these men and women are at the Wall to demean, diminish, and “wipe away the evil plots of the wicked.” Have we not learned!!! How can Jews treat each other with such hatred and bigotry after so many were led to gas chambers?! 

     The holiday of Tisha B’Av (9th of Av)was created by our Rabbis to remind us precisely of the destruction hatred can do to our people and the sanctity of God’s name in the world. We mourn, fast, and sing the dirges of the book of Lamentations to remind ourselves of this great failing and the consequence of hatred of Jew against Jew. Those who profess to be “most observant” should certainly know this. It is sadly a shame on all of us, on the Jewish people, and a definitive perversion of God’s Torah. We are after all commanded to “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Sadly we have not yet internalized the meaning of Tisha B’Av. Woe to us, if the generation who has witnessed the rebirth of Jewish independence in our homeland, have forgotten what hatred destroyed and what it has the capacity to destroy. 

A Jewish Success Story

     As Alice Cooper’s song goes, “School’s out for Summer!” Yes, another school year has ended but that doesn’t mean that the best opportunities for Jewish connection and growth aren’t just ahead for our children. One of the most Jewishly impactful and meaningful experiences for children is attending a Jewish summer camp. Whether it is a day camp like Temple Beth David’s, the JCC’s Camp Shalom, a Jewish travel camp like USY on Wheels, or a sleep away camp like Blue Star, Camp Shalom, Camp Ramah or Camp Coleman, these camps provide an intensive dose of Jewish life that is both innovative, filled with fun and ruach (spirit). Camp is where many of the latest and greatest Jewish songs and music find their origin. Camp is where ruach reigns and Jewish life comes alive. Jewish summer camps are the trendsetters for our children creating their own Jewish communities, and taking ownership of what they should look like. They are the intensive social laboratories where Jewish values and traditions meet our fun, social, and energetic children where they are. Part of the magic is that parents are out of the picture for a little while, and part of it is the idillic natural settings that inspire wonder and foster community. This allows for the kids to find out who they are, and what they enjoy without being graded or pushed in a particular direction. They can explore, try new things, and test out freedom in the safety that only camp can provide. 

     Imagine our children all singing together arm in arm for Havdallah, connecting with Israeli schlichim (ambassadors) at soccer tournaments, using the Hebrew language not in the classroom but in their common vernacular for things at camp, or just making lasting Jewish friends that travel to each other’s b’nei mitzvah from all over the country. Jewish sociologists and identity researchers who are often pessimistic about the American Jewish community have long know and universally agree that the intensive Jewish social atmosphere of camp indelibly shapes Jewish observance and commitment in our children for a lifetime. When adults are asked what their best spiritual Jewish experience has been they often wax poetic about the Jewish camp they attended.  The friendships made, the connection with Judaism energized all in the context of fun in the sun continues to be transformative to our Jewish community years after our children have grown up and left camp. So if your children are off to a Jewish summer camp, I pray that they experiment freely with their Judaism, grow, laugh, sing, and fill their hearts with the vitality of Jewish community. And if you have been thinking of sending your child to a Jewish summer camp but are not sure - even the youngest of children can benefit. So go ahead try it! - your child may not be the only one transformed by the experience. 

Celebrate Israel's 65th by Reclaiming the Miracle

If you pick up a copy of almost any newspaper, online or in print, on almost any day there will be an article about events in Israel. Nine times out of ten the article will be about how Israel did something wrong, or an existential threat to Israel or some other negative event or problem. It's like having a member of your family who is always in trouble, always faced with a crisis, anytime you talk about this family member it always leaves you disheartened to the point of throwing your hands up in resignation. “What can I do?” or even worse, "Why should I care?" It is mired in this type of thinking and apathy that we need to step back and take a deep breathe to gain some perspective. Israel was and is a miracle unfolding. No it is not perfect. But perfection is not the goal – rather it is perfecting. The work is never finished but everyone adds their efforts to the dream. This is what the Jewish people have always striven for – Jews living in the land of our ancestors determining our own destiny. I believe more than ever as we celebrate Israel’s 65th birthday we must reclaim and redefine the miracle of Israel for ourselves.

To be clear, reclaiming the miracle of Israel is not only for those with little or no connection to Israel, but maybe even more importantly, is crucial for those of us who are passionate supporters of Israel, who have traveled to Israel, 1, 2, a dozen times, and who see both Israel's importance in the fate of our world, and who place it at the very heart of our people, our faith, and our future. We must remember that Israel is not an abstract place or a pundit driven debate, but instead is a member of the family, with a seat always set at the table. I believe that our love for Israel challenges us to continually ask ourselves, “What do I believe Israel’s place is in my life? What is the miracle for me? Why is Israel not like any other place? And what can I do to be part of the building, creating, and perfecting of Israel?”

For me the miracle of Israel is that the state of Israel with the largest majority of the Jewish people in the world, whether religious, secular, Zionist, post-Zionist, young, old, wealthy, poor, kibbutznik, settler, left wing, right wing, acts as the canvas for creating, building, wrestling, and redefining a nation based on the values of our unique Jewish history and tradition. It was one miracle to bring the state into being, and to defend her, it is another miracle to see what in 65 years Israelis have done to build our homeland and make it flourish. For all we have accomplished and for all we have yet to accomplish we should celebrate together on Yom Ha’aztmaut April 16th. In the process we can rededicate ourselves to first reclaiming the miracle, and then to taking our place as an active part of it.

Chag Sameach! Happy 65th Birthday to Israel!

L'Haggid - Telling Our Own Story

         Okay, I admit it, I am a Haggadah connoisseur, I have prints from all over Europe, an assortment of contemporary Haggadot, and even different versions of the classic Maxwell House Haggadah (Yes, even it has changed over the years). I have found one of the most fun ways to make the seder lively is for each participant to use a different Haggadah. While the basic order of the seder remains consistent, the real highlight is the perspective each Haggadah takes in telling the story of Passover in the Maggid section. For example, I have a book that tells the 4 Questions in 140 languages including Klingon! It’s fun to explore different interpretations of the story of Passover, and to find new and creative ways to discuss the core of what the Passover holiday is all about. From the fight of the Refusniks in the 1980’s to the rescue of Ethiopian Jews, whenever we gather together around the seder table Jews are bound to tell the story of Passover with an eye to the world around us and the continuing push for freedom and social justice. 

       

      The Haggadah, which comes from the Hebrew word - to tell, by definition challenges us to tell the story of Passover and to see ourselves as part of that story. In truth the object of the Maggid section is not to just read every word and call it a night or even to mumble a little and then skip ahead. The real objective is to move each of us to tell the story of Passover in a way that is meaningful to us, so that we in the end feel ourselves to be a part of the story. It is after all a story that has not yet seen it’s ending written, with still too much suffering, too many people oppressed, and a world not yet at peace and in balance. So whether your creating your own college seder with friends, or joining your family seder don’t forget to give everyone a part in telling the story of our ancestors but also remember it is the story of us.

Chag Kasher v’Sameach! - A happy and sweet Passover!

A Tale of Two Holidays

     How many times have you heard the joke about making the Megillah reading shorter by just saying simply, “Hey, they tried to kill us, they failed, now let’s eat!” Sadly, the story of Purim wasn’t the first story in the Hebrew Bible where Jews were demonized, persecuted and murdered because we were Jews. That dark distinction is found first in the book of Exodus, where Pharaoh’s advisors convince him that the Jews should be enslaved because they could rise up and side with Egypt’s enemies. Then emboldened Pharaoh takes the next step with the world’s first recorded genocide, having Jewish baby boys drowned and killed in the Nile. In the story of Purim, once again an eerily parallel plot begins to unfold with another kingly advisor – Haman (Boo!) spreading fear and prejudice to single out the Jewish people. Haman riles up King Ahashverus, and the Persian people, claiming that the Jews were not only strangers in the land with foreign customs but, that they refused to follow the king’s laws. In both stories lies, mistrust and xenophobia are used to further denigrate the Jewish people in the eyes of the masses. The result is the systematic hatred of another people (the Jews) who had been living peacefully in their country. 

     Frightfully, the troubles and ills facing the Egyptians and later Persians, coupled with the easy targeting of foreigners (Jews lived in Goshen, Jews dressed differently, etc.) turns what were once neighbors and countrymen into oppressors and accomplices to these evil plots. Furthermore, just as in the Exodus story the service, leadership, and dedication of the Jews to the king, country and community, was forgotten and replaced instead by virulent anti-Semitism. So what can we learn from the similarities between Passover and Purim? –  namely that as Jews must stand up against intolerance, prejudice and hatred wherever, and whenever it rears its ugly head. As George Santayana said, "Those who cannot remember the past, are condemned to repeat it." Whether in the halls of our schools, the offices we work, the clubhouses where we socialize, or the digital domains we frequent, we must strive to be vigilant against racism, sexism, religious hatred, and prejudice. We sadly know all too well what can happen when these are left unchecked. So as we look forward to eating our hamantaschen and drowning out Haman’s name with our groggers, let each of us do our part to make sure that the lessons of Passover and Purim never fade from our collective memories and from the memory of the world.

Chag Purim Sameach! – A Happy and Joyous Purim!