Latkes and Cranberry Sauce: Perfect Together!

If I were the Hallmark cards company, I would take advantage of a super-limited once in a 77,000 year opportunity to print Thanksgivukkah cards. Not only could they be collectors items but who knows if paper cards will even exist then! But the confluence of Thanksgiving and Hanukkah have a lot more in common than meets the eye, particularly in their origin stories. Hanukkah as a holiday commemorates the struggle for Jewish religious and political freedom. Buckling under the tyranny of both the Greeks and their hellenistic Jewish sympathizers, Jews were forbidden to practice Judaism. They were humiliated, forced to partake of pagan rituals, and killed. Finally, a group of freedom fighters, led by Mattathias and his five sons, took up arms and after a long gorilla war, won our independence. The holiday of Hanukkah was instituted by the victors to commemorate the military victory and the purification and rededication (the Hebrew word Hanukkah means to Dedicate) of the Temple. 

For the Puritans, aka the “Pilgrims”, they first came to these shores to seek refuge and escape the religious persecution and intolerance they faced in England. Willing to risk their lives and that of their families, they set sail to a relatively unknown land with few of the basic skills they would need to survive here. Yet, their hope was to found a “new Jerusalem”, and create a community and society based on their own religious convictions. One of their religious beliefs was a literal reading and strict adherence to the Bible. The Puritans made a point of celebrating each of the Torah’s holidays. They strictly observed the Sabbath, Pentecost (meaning revelation of the 5 books - our holiday of Shavuot), Thanksgiving (our harvest thanksgiving holiday of Sukkot), and Easter (pascal lamb & last supper). While it is most certainly true that without the help and guidance of Native Americans the Pilgrims would have perished in their new land, it is not out of the realm of possibility that they would have also celebrated a harvest Thanksgiving holiday a la Sukkot with their Native American neighbors.

Both ironically and sadly, these same Pilgrims, would later persecute Jews seeking the same religious freedom in America. In fact when, the first Jews came to America, escaping from the long arm of the Catholic Church’s Spanish (and later Portuguese) Inquisition, they faced harsh religious intolerance and outright anti-Semitism at the hands of the Pilgrims. The Jewish community of Massachusetts Bay Colony were summarily thrown out of the territory and had to seek refuge from Roger Williams in Rhodes Island (i.e.,Touro Synagogue). 

Another aspect that both Hanukkah and Thanksgiving share is how the holidays added traditions different from their original stories and meanings. If the original Hanukkah holiday was focused on the Maccabean victory and the Temple; the holiday today, thanks to our ancient Rabbis, focuses on God’s miracle of the oil, and the lighting of the hanukkiah. In effect our tradition morphed Hanukkah from essentially a one day victory feast, to an eight day celebration focused on lighting one’s home, and a public display of Jewish identity (The Hanukkiah was traditionally placed in the window and lit so passersby could see - b’farhesiah). In modern times, Hanukkah changed yet again with presents, decorations, Jewish pride and Adam Sandler’s Hanukkah Song now a part of the Festival of Lights. The Thanksgiving of today also evolved over time. When President Abraham Lincoln officially instituted Thanksgiving, I am sure he could not imagine the Macy’s parade, NFL football, or sadly the mad rush of consumerism which has overtaken Thanksgiving’s original intention of giving thanks to God for home and hearth. 

With Hanukkah and Thanksgiving falling together this year, I believe we have a unique opportunity as Jewish Americans to educate ourselves and others about the true meaning of these holidays. From their origins of religious tolerance, thankfulness to God for all of the blessings we enjoy, and the co-operation and hope for our communities and society, we certainly have a lot to celebrate. So let’s enjoy our latkes with cranberry sauce, open our pantries to those in need, and bring the light of God into the world with kindness and joy! 

Happy Thanksgivukkah!

You Are Not Alone: An Answer to Sh’ma Koleinu

One of the most moving prayers during the past month of holidays is the prayer Sh’ma Koleinu – which literally means – “Hear Our Voice.” This prayer is a deep heartfelt plea to God not to abandon us, not to hide from us, but instead to hear our prayers and renew us. Traditionally the Cantor chants each verse and the congregation repeats it. I have often wondered why we would even need such a prayer? After all by this point in the service we have already been praying to God for quite some time! Yet, there is something so emotional about the poet’s words, a feeling of vulnerability and weakness, a fear of being alone even in a group, a feeling that if God can’t hear us in our pain then who will?

For some types of hurt, sharing our pain with others is part of our tradition, and often it is out in the open, and can be easily recognized. When we suffer a loss of a loved one, the mourner literally shows their grief by tearing clothing/ribbon as an outward sign of their broken heart. The community responds to the mourner by comforting the mourner, bringing food, attending minyanim, and surrounding them with love and support.

But, there is another type of hurt that is all too often hidden and not in our communal consciousness enough – the pain of Domestic Abuse.  October is National Domestic Violence Awareness month, and for too many in our community, the physical, verbal, and psychological abuse they suffer is a secret. It is hidden by makeup, an outward appearance of normalcy, and shame. It is a constant fear that no one will believe them, a fear of what will happen if they come forward, and a fear of what their abuser might do to them if they found out.

The stereotypes of “that doesn’t happen in the Jewish community”, or “nice Jewish boys/girls don’t do that”, or “this is a only a women’s issue”, or “it only happens in poor households” not only are completely wrong, but actually often act as social barriers for the victims who are contemplating how to get help. Too many instead suffer silently, afraid, intimidated and alone.

What these hidden members of our congregations and our community need is a voice, someone to speak out and then to answer their private Sh’ma Koleinu. That’s where the Rosenberg Domestic Abuse program* and KOLOT come in. The Rosenberg Domestic Abuse program is a part of Alpert Jewish Family & Children's Services. It is a safe place for anyone who is suffering from abuse to get help and support. You are not alone! We are here for you and no one has the right to diminish and abuse you, especially those who are closest to you. Whether it is your wife, husband, boyfriend or girlfriend, it is not your fault and there is never an excuse for abuse. KOLOT is the communal voice to raise awareness. It is made up of clergy, community leaders, but mostly caring men and women who want to help in a tangible way. Our community teen trainers teach their peers about healthy and unhealthy relationships and the signs of abuse. Finally, the annual “No Excuse For Abuse” Luncheon brings together hundreds dedicated to getting out the message that abuse happens in our Jewish community and we need to support the victims and caregivers. 

The pain of abuse alone is terrible, the suffering in silence only makes it worse. Let us be a sukkat shalom – a refuge of wholeness to those who are still suffering under abuse, and let us be there to hear their prayers of Sh’ma Koleinu and answer them with our own voices of courage, comfort, and love.

*Rosenberg Domestic Abuse hotline number: 561 684-1991

When Rosh HaShanah Comes Early & Other Calendar Quirks

Okay, here’s a question for all you trivia buffs out there. When was the last time Rosh Hashanah began as early as September 5th? 

Give up? Try 1899! That was the year that Queens and Staten Island became part of New York City, the Great Blizzard of 1899 pounded South Florida with snow, and fighting in Afghanistan continued to rage (then it was the British but sadly some things never change). This was also the year when the paperclip and Bayer aspirin were patented, and voting machines were okay’d for federal elections.(Hmm, chads, hanging or not) Yep, the last time Rosh Hashanah fell on September 5th was the year the Bronx Zoo opened in New York, and when all is said and done, it will be another 76 years (2089) until this Rosh Hashanah comes this early again. 

So as you can imagine rabbis everywhere are scrambling to finish sermons and Jews everywhere are asking, “has the Jewish calendar gone crazy!?” Well, not exactly. In reality the Jewish calendar works on a 19 year cycle adding a 13th month (Adar 2) in years 3, 6, 8, 11, 14, 17 and 19. This is year 17 of that cycle and represents the longest possible year in the Jewish calendar of 385 days. The Jewish calendar which is based primarily on the lunar cycle, makes these adjustments in order to keep the holidays in sync with with solar seasons. This keeps Passover in the spring and Sukkot in the fall. While it is not uncommon for the calendar to add a month during these leap years or for the holidays to be “early” or “late”, what is different this year is the extreme “earliness” in relation to the secular calendar. The next time Rosh Hashanah will fall on September 5th will as mentioned above be in 2089 or in the Jewish counting 5850 which is why this year is so special. 

But wait that’s not all. This year the first night of Hanukkah and Thanksgiving are on the same day! According to Steve Morse, this is the first time that’s happened since President Lincoln originally established Thanksgiving in 1863 and it is also the last time it'll happen until the year 79,811. I'll say that again: after this year, Hanukkah and Thanksgiving Day won’t overlap for another 77,798 years! The reason is because the Jewish calendar is very slowly getting out of sync with the solar calendar, at a rate of 4 days per 1000 years (not bad for a many centuries old calendar!) This means that while presently Hanukkah can be as early as 11/28, over the years the calendar will drift forward, such that the earliest Hanukkah can be is 11/29. It is my belief that at some distant future time the rabbis will again need to come together and recalibrate the calendar for another 5 thousand years. Until then we can all enjoy the special nature of this extraordinary new year. 

May the new year of 5774 be filled  with the blessings of good health, happiness, and prosperity for you and your family! 

Tisha B'Av & The Danger of Hatred

Why can’t we learn! In the year 70 CE the Romans destroyed the Temple, throwing down the stones and burning the rest. What remained was the retaining platform of which the Western Wall is a part. Even as smoke still rose from the destroyed Temple, our Sages realized that the destruction was not merely the power of Rome but, at its core the baseless hatred among our own Jewish people that led had led to this tragedy and God’s wrath. The Talmud retells the story of two Jews (Kamsa and Bar-Kamsa)who so despised each other that one of them provokes the Romans and convinces them that the Jews are plotting a revolt, and need to be subdued. Hatred among Jews, the Rabbis teach is the reason the Temple was destroyed. 

     Fast forward to the assassination of Yitzhak Rabin, the Prime Minister of Israel. Who was so vilified in right wing extreme circles by “rabbis” (I use that term lightly) who called for anything to stop peace talks. Sadly those hateful words became the marching orders for Yigal Amir to murder Rabin at a peace rally in Tel Aviv. Could we learn from this tragedy again the danger of hate? Could we ratchet down the rhetoric of demonization in favor of dialogue and mutual respect for a pluralism of opinions and practices? Could we take from this that violence and coercion do not strengthen us but instead weaken us? After all we already have enough enemies from without who dream of how to destroy us. Maybe, just maybe we could learn and change.

 
     Now fast forward to May 10th of this year. Women gather to pray at the Western Wall, the remnant of our holiest site, the place which reminds us of both God’s glory and our history - joyful and sad. As the women gathered to pray on Rosh Hodesh (welcoming the new month)on the women’s side, with talitot and tefillin, reading Torah, not forcing others to pray as they do, but wishing to express their own religious connection to God and our tradition, they are spat on, bombarded by water bottles, coffee cups, rocks, and a chair while hundreds of men shout curses at them. Israeli riot police have to hold back hundreds of screaming men who are trying to break through to harass them. Encouraged by their Ultra-Orthodox haredi rabbis, these men and women are at the Wall to demean, diminish, and “wipe away the evil plots of the wicked.” Have we not learned!!! How can Jews treat each other with such hatred and bigotry after so many were led to gas chambers?! 

     The holiday of Tisha B’Av (9th of Av)was created by our Rabbis to remind us precisely of the destruction hatred can do to our people and the sanctity of God’s name in the world. We mourn, fast, and sing the dirges of the book of Lamentations to remind ourselves of this great failing and the consequence of hatred of Jew against Jew. Those who profess to be “most observant” should certainly know this. It is sadly a shame on all of us, on the Jewish people, and a definitive perversion of God’s Torah. We are after all commanded to “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Sadly we have not yet internalized the meaning of Tisha B’Av. Woe to us, if the generation who has witnessed the rebirth of Jewish independence in our homeland, have forgotten what hatred destroyed and what it has the capacity to destroy. 

A Jewish Success Story

     As Alice Cooper’s song goes, “School’s out for Summer!” Yes, another school year has ended but that doesn’t mean that the best opportunities for Jewish connection and growth aren’t just ahead for our children. One of the most Jewishly impactful and meaningful experiences for children is attending a Jewish summer camp. Whether it is a day camp like Temple Beth David’s, the JCC’s Camp Shalom, a Jewish travel camp like USY on Wheels, or a sleep away camp like Blue Star, Camp Shalom, Camp Ramah or Camp Coleman, these camps provide an intensive dose of Jewish life that is both innovative, filled with fun and ruach (spirit). Camp is where many of the latest and greatest Jewish songs and music find their origin. Camp is where ruach reigns and Jewish life comes alive. Jewish summer camps are the trendsetters for our children creating their own Jewish communities, and taking ownership of what they should look like. They are the intensive social laboratories where Jewish values and traditions meet our fun, social, and energetic children where they are. Part of the magic is that parents are out of the picture for a little while, and part of it is the idillic natural settings that inspire wonder and foster community. This allows for the kids to find out who they are, and what they enjoy without being graded or pushed in a particular direction. They can explore, try new things, and test out freedom in the safety that only camp can provide. 

     Imagine our children all singing together arm in arm for Havdallah, connecting with Israeli schlichim (ambassadors) at soccer tournaments, using the Hebrew language not in the classroom but in their common vernacular for things at camp, or just making lasting Jewish friends that travel to each other’s b’nei mitzvah from all over the country. Jewish sociologists and identity researchers who are often pessimistic about the American Jewish community have long know and universally agree that the intensive Jewish social atmosphere of camp indelibly shapes Jewish observance and commitment in our children for a lifetime. When adults are asked what their best spiritual Jewish experience has been they often wax poetic about the Jewish camp they attended.  The friendships made, the connection with Judaism energized all in the context of fun in the sun continues to be transformative to our Jewish community years after our children have grown up and left camp. So if your children are off to a Jewish summer camp, I pray that they experiment freely with their Judaism, grow, laugh, sing, and fill their hearts with the vitality of Jewish community. And if you have been thinking of sending your child to a Jewish summer camp but are not sure - even the youngest of children can benefit. So go ahead try it! - your child may not be the only one transformed by the experience. 

Celebrate Israel's 65th by Reclaiming the Miracle

If you pick up a copy of almost any newspaper, online or in print, on almost any day there will be an article about events in Israel. Nine times out of ten the article will be about how Israel did something wrong, or an existential threat to Israel or some other negative event or problem. It's like having a member of your family who is always in trouble, always faced with a crisis, anytime you talk about this family member it always leaves you disheartened to the point of throwing your hands up in resignation. “What can I do?” or even worse, "Why should I care?" It is mired in this type of thinking and apathy that we need to step back and take a deep breathe to gain some perspective. Israel was and is a miracle unfolding. No it is not perfect. But perfection is not the goal – rather it is perfecting. The work is never finished but everyone adds their efforts to the dream. This is what the Jewish people have always striven for – Jews living in the land of our ancestors determining our own destiny. I believe more than ever as we celebrate Israel’s 65th birthday we must reclaim and redefine the miracle of Israel for ourselves.

To be clear, reclaiming the miracle of Israel is not only for those with little or no connection to Israel, but maybe even more importantly, is crucial for those of us who are passionate supporters of Israel, who have traveled to Israel, 1, 2, a dozen times, and who see both Israel's importance in the fate of our world, and who place it at the very heart of our people, our faith, and our future. We must remember that Israel is not an abstract place or a pundit driven debate, but instead is a member of the family, with a seat always set at the table. I believe that our love for Israel challenges us to continually ask ourselves, “What do I believe Israel’s place is in my life? What is the miracle for me? Why is Israel not like any other place? And what can I do to be part of the building, creating, and perfecting of Israel?”

For me the miracle of Israel is that the state of Israel with the largest majority of the Jewish people in the world, whether religious, secular, Zionist, post-Zionist, young, old, wealthy, poor, kibbutznik, settler, left wing, right wing, acts as the canvas for creating, building, wrestling, and redefining a nation based on the values of our unique Jewish history and tradition. It was one miracle to bring the state into being, and to defend her, it is another miracle to see what in 65 years Israelis have done to build our homeland and make it flourish. For all we have accomplished and for all we have yet to accomplish we should celebrate together on Yom Ha’aztmaut April 16th. In the process we can rededicate ourselves to first reclaiming the miracle, and then to taking our place as an active part of it.

Chag Sameach! Happy 65th Birthday to Israel!

L'Haggid - Telling Our Own Story

         Okay, I admit it, I am a Haggadah connoisseur, I have prints from all over Europe, an assortment of contemporary Haggadot, and even different versions of the classic Maxwell House Haggadah (Yes, even it has changed over the years). I have found one of the most fun ways to make the seder lively is for each participant to use a different Haggadah. While the basic order of the seder remains consistent, the real highlight is the perspective each Haggadah takes in telling the story of Passover in the Maggid section. For example, I have a book that tells the 4 Questions in 140 languages including Klingon! It’s fun to explore different interpretations of the story of Passover, and to find new and creative ways to discuss the core of what the Passover holiday is all about. From the fight of the Refusniks in the 1980’s to the rescue of Ethiopian Jews, whenever we gather together around the seder table Jews are bound to tell the story of Passover with an eye to the world around us and the continuing push for freedom and social justice. 

       

      The Haggadah, which comes from the Hebrew word - to tell, by definition challenges us to tell the story of Passover and to see ourselves as part of that story. In truth the object of the Maggid section is not to just read every word and call it a night or even to mumble a little and then skip ahead. The real objective is to move each of us to tell the story of Passover in a way that is meaningful to us, so that we in the end feel ourselves to be a part of the story. It is after all a story that has not yet seen it’s ending written, with still too much suffering, too many people oppressed, and a world not yet at peace and in balance. So whether your creating your own college seder with friends, or joining your family seder don’t forget to give everyone a part in telling the story of our ancestors but also remember it is the story of us.

Chag Kasher v’Sameach! - A happy and sweet Passover!